Monday, August 3, 2009

A Weekend in the life...........

Sometimes things go just as you plan. Other times, ....................not so much.

This last weekend the boys and I were able to go up to Spokane with Jody for the weekend. He had to drill ( his reserve service weekend ), and this weekend was set aside as a Pre-deployment Family weekend. These are setup for us to become more familiar with the services that are out there when our Reservist is mobilized. Half of you that just read that, your hearts just stopped. Yes, that means Jody may be deployed again soon. We don't know when yet or for sure where, but we do know that it is coming.

So Friday night after work we pack our three boys, and the one I babysit, up into a truck and drive north. ( tay stayed behind because she had a church commitment on Sunday a.m.) There were six seats in this truck, and we had three car seats and one teenager whose legs are beginning to get too long for his own good. I drove, Jody slept ( or tried to rather) Hunter sat in the middle front because his legs were short enough not to interfere with the manual transmission.... in the "back" ( a term used loosely.... it was plenty wide enough back there just no leg room ) was Hayden behind Jody, Evan in the middle with his knees somewhere up around his ears, and Jeremiah behind me. Before driving away, everyone has used the bathroom............... yes..... this is an important fact to note.

We are 20 miles out of town, and from behind me.... I hear........ "I'm a need a go to da potty mommy" This is Jeremiah telling me something of great importance. To him I reply .... "are you SERIOUS?" ( with a tone that is quite incredulous ) This is a rhetorical question I know, because i do not seriously expect him to answer me with a .... " hey mom, nope... i was just joking...haha" We are in the middle of potty training, and he is in "big boy pants" and we are 20 miles from home and even farther from anything that resembles a bathroom. He should have been fine and not needed a bathroom for at least the 2 hours that it would have taken to reach our destination... but NOOOO.... my boy decides to get a happy bladder. It is decision time.... pull over and risk our lives so he can pee........... or let him pee his pants. For the sake of furthering the greater good of never having to change another diaper........ I pull over. In the process i forget that i am driving a stick shift and kill it as we pull off the road......... great trip so far.

Jody climbs out ( he is muttering something under his breath about how he should have taken his chances and driven himself in his own car...) and i dive out the driver door, inbetween semi trucks, and go to the "safer" side of the truck to take out Jeremiah. After being passed out of his chair over his brother and over Hayden.... he is in my arms........ If you have potty trained a boy, you are now snickering at my predicament.... if you haven't.... let me explain. Potty training boys SIT on a toilet. They do so, so their mothers bathrooms do not smell like a truck stop. They are too short yet to reach, and they lack a certain amount of "control" ... shall i say.... and that part of the anatomy can be MORE than an untamed fire hose, if not carefully directed in the right way by sitting them down..... So now i am holding him, and trying to figure out what to do without getting him bit by something or wetting the whole of his outfit and my feet. I will spare you the details.... but i will say we looked something like a TV ad for Twister. Ok... that done... back over Hayden, over Evan and put him back in.... he decides he needs to go again. Out he comes.... again over Evan, over Hayden.......back to Twister pose.... done, back in the chair.

Don't let anyone kid you. Girls are not the only sex that like to travel to the potty and pee together. This syndrome happens to boys too, when they are given the chance to pee in the great outdoors. They will flock in droves to be able to pee on a tire!.... So out comes Hayden, who is also potty training.... i put him in the full Twister position... he get shy... nothing happens. Ok... child two back in seat.... then HUNTER! he decides he feels the need.... so out he comes... and then back in.... all the while we are being buffet-ted by semi trucks rushing past at 65 mph, and Jody is standing at the back of the truck facing traffic ( and blocking any "view" ... muttering under his breath about what he is going to tell some yahoo cop, should he choose this moment to pull over and check on us...)

20 minutes later ( it felt like an hour) we are all back in our seats and ready to merge back onto the highway. At this point I receive a text from my husband that says... " good times eh?" A text??!!??.... he is sitting close enough to TOUCH..... it is going to be a long weekend....... i can tell.

we make it there without any other potty stops and get a chance to relax a bit.

The next day we headed out on foot to Riverfront Park in downtown Spokane. There is a mini amusement park, an antique carousel, gondola... lots to do.We rode on the carousel, and walked around and ate lunch. It was early enough to not be too hot, and the kids slid down the Radio Flyer wagon, and chased the geese back into the water. Jeremiah stepped into a puddle full of goose poop and slime... but hey... he is a wash and wear kind of kid.

We walked all over greater Spokane looking for an ATM that was at least one of our bank's... (just so i could pay cash to go on the carousel .) It was quite the adventure... we eventually found one... it was out of service...(sigh) we found another one in the Parkcade ( Spokane's Transit Authority Hub).... not quite the Greyhound Terminal in downtown S.F..... but a close second.

We posed for some arranged photo's....

It is hard to believe that Evan was about that size when Hunter was born!

During our travels we stopped at the mall for lunch. After eating and running around i decided to take both boys to the bathroom before we went out to continue exploring the park. They had this family bathroom.... and it was great.... two toilets... two little boys... perfect! Hayden on first.... as he gets started the auto flush went off.... scared the poor boy TO DEATH.... his head whipped around and stared at the wall looking to see what loud noise violated his tranquility. Needless to say.... all progress was scared to a stop. ( later that night i took him to the bathroom in the resturant.... and he sat, and slowly turned to see if there was the same evil noise maker as the last public potty... I reassured him that this one wouldn't do that. As soon as the words were out of my mouth... the automatic towel dispenser went off all by itself.... the poor boy is not ever going to want to enter a public restroom again with all the noises it does on it's own! )

And then after lunch decided to head home. Hunter had declared that he was too tired to walk, and cajoled Evan into "carrying" him all the way home, since he had walked 6000 miles, and couldn't take another step. ( never mind we all walked those 6000 miles with him..... )

I stopped and took this picture, because it is rare that they actually do this....

I am walking ahead of them, pushing the little boys in the stroller, and sweating way more than i care to..... and i hear.... " Evan, when i am bigger, and i have a facebook page.... you know, when i am like a teenager and stuff, I am going to take that picture that mom just did, and i am going to say..."ID just grew another head" " I was crackin up......... he wants to be big like his brother and sister so bad.... he is already thinking about his facebook page......... he is a hoot. His other memorable quote was that morning when he was watching Evan get ready... Evan was putting on his deodorant ( i know, thank goodness... hee hee ) and Hunter sighs.... and says.... " Man, when am i going to get to stink, so i can wear that stuff"..... Oh Hunter, don't grow up too fast, getting to wear deoderant... is more of a job, than a privilege....

So after we get back to the hotel, i decided that i better make good on the promise i made to go swimming. My sanity clearly had been warped by the heat.... but i figured i better go while the pool was fairly empty. So i swim diaper the little ones... make sure Evan takes out his contacts, peel Hunter off the ceiling because he was so excited..... and head to the pool, praying that Hayden doesn't drown on me while i am babysitting him.....

We march to the pool and both little boys decide that they want to jump off the side of the pool into the waiting arms of Evan and I. Catching these boys is about as different of an experience as they are as individuals. Jeremiah gets out of the water turns around and is ready to go... Hayden stands on the side and dances and waves his arms and sort of squawks like a chicken waiting till you tell him it is his turn, then he calms down and focuses on you and nods twice and jumps. Hayden jumps off nice and straight... Jeremiah comes at you like he is trying to belly flop and you sort of feel like you have been hit by a truck. So Evan, who wanted to do anything but play with little boys was gracious enough to help me catch.... We did this at least 500 times, until Jeremiah jumped out at me, and preceding him was a "burp" that flew out of his mouth and on to me, it was a mixture of pool water and the applesauce from lunch. Mommy was done in the pool for the day. As i was trying to get the little boys out, and air dried a bit, before the walk back to the room..... I was sitting with Hayden and Jeremiah decided that in protest for having to stop jumping.... he would put one of our two dry room towels.... COMPLETELY into the pool... Yes it was really nap time....

We will move along to Sunday, After a raging screaming fit from Jeremiah because i didn't buy HIM a coffee at Dutch Brothers..... we were arrive at the NOSC (military acronym for something.... but i don't remember what.... just translate it as where Jody goes to drill ) ... and attempt to keep two toddlers quiet through 3 hours of presentations on such terribly entertaining subjects as, TriCare Dental coverage, VA benefits, and Military One Source benefits.....

When Jeremiah started petting the arm hair of the gentleman next to him.... it was time to go for a walk.... We rounded out the day with a poopy swimsuit. (seriously... if you were two, and had an endless supply of water and water toys, would you come tell your mom that you had to poo? Yeah, i didn't think so....) At the NOSC.... and trust me, it is a military installation.... they don't believe in diaper changing stations in the bathrooms. I mean on the whole the place is staffed with men.... why would they need diaper changing stations???...... So i followed the Seabee motto "adapt and overcome" and washed out the swim trunks, put them back on him.... and sent him back out to play in the water for a few more hours.

The best part was the way home.... everyone was worn out.... and slept... and i was able to decompress and enjoy the silence on the way home. Ahhhhhhhhhhh.


  1. Wow. Now i'm tired just from reading about your weekend! i remember being young enough and energetic enough to do that sort of stuff!

  2. I find it fascinating; in your newest yarn at least, that you were gracious enough to portray me as the grumpy ol'mountain man cum' down from the hill who despises everyone.... it's so comforting to know all the world who reads it the least...leave me alone !!! LOL
    Aaaannnndd, not that there are many acronyms in the military (pppwwwaaahhh), but NOSC is one of the newest changes ('cuz th' last ten weren't good enough...sheeesh) meaning Navy Operational Support Center. Basically, it's a place where the Seabees who are away from the immediate proximity of Battalion HQ are put with those from the "surface, submarine and air" Navy; who by and large (Except "Family Day") despise us, for Administrative Support. Translated..... it's an available building where we are put where there is another CO (who has no idea what it is we do......honestly, you have no who will "babysit" us since we are so far away from Fort Lewis.... LOL

  3. i applaud your water antics with the boys. took eli and lee to the beach on friday- never again! at least not till they're old enough to get the sand out of their own you know where's. despite the fact eli's been potty trained for over a year i found myself in much the same predicament as you. and don't even ask about lee. what would posess a girl to fill an already full diaper (not smart enough to pack swim diapers)with mud is beyond me. i'm praying for ya babe as i'm praying for me.


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