Thursday, May 13, 2010

Jeremiah's Gems......

So, it is no secret that I live with a crew of natural comedians.  Their natural sarcasm, and crazy antics keep me not only hopping, but frequently laughing so hard it hurts.  Other times the things they say are sweet and tender and born from child-like innocence that we long for as we "grow-up" and become hardened by the world.

Today, in the midst of wanting to kill Jeremiah... he came up with one of those innocent sweet moments.... and it truly saved his life.

Let me back track...

I have been attempting to listen to an online web seminar.... it started yesterday, and I heard about half.  Today, I am fairing about the same... listen to one session, spend the next session with it playing but I am up and doing kitchen work or putting out fires or directing school work....

For the last two days, Jeremiah has woken up with his grouch on.  He has been bent on running amok... seeking that which he can destroy, and frankly, he has been rather successful.

This morning, he began the day with yelling at me because I wouldn't let him eat peppermint candy for breakfast, from there he moved to dumping half a bottle of puppy shampoo into the bathtub, there were some moments of relative calm as he played in the dirt outside with the puppies....  it was short lived, because I heard grunting, from out on  the back porch.  As I am walking to the window, I say... "Jeremiah?  What are you doing out there?"  Quickly he replies, "I am trying to go potty, and Zeke is wicking my weenah." 
All I can do is sigh, a big heavy loud... I really don't even want to go to the window and SEE this kind of sigh...............  I want to throw- up.... but that would have been counterproductive.  So, instead, I calmly tell him "STOP PEEING ON THE PORCH!.... and go use the BATHROOM!"   He dutifully picks up his underwear, drops it into the dirty clothes pile on the way to the bathroom and goes there to finish his "business".  Soon, I hear....  "Jeremiah! stop it!  Stop squeezing RIGHT now!" , from Tayler.  Apparently, he had finished rather quickly, and had decided that half of the toothpaste tube needed to be emptied into the sink. Again, I sigh.  I go finish him up, and go to get more undies and shorts for him.... since clearly he needs no encouragement to disrobe....

 As he comes in to get dressed we discuss the fact that I am disappointed with his destructive behavior today. He looks at me with genuine wonder.... I can tell he is thinking he hasn't done anything so bad that I should be disappointed.  I go on to further explain that God would not be happy with his destruction either.  I informed him that he was not being a good steward of the things that God had entrusted to us; that dumping out soap and toothpaste is wasteful.

This is where he has his little moment.........

He stops in mid-wiggle... and looks at me seriously and says, " Dod, is in my Hawt".
I reply, " Yes, God is in your heart, and he is sad with the way you have been behaving today."
" I need to ast Dod for fordiveness"
" Yes, Jeremiah, you should ask God for forgiveness."
At this, he lifts his shirt up and exposes his belly button....  and begins to speak.  " Deawah Dod, do you fordive me for my disduction today?"  then he looks up and me after a pause, " Did he fordive me?  I didn't hewah him?"
" Yes Jeremiah, He forgave you.  Now remember when we ask for forgiveness, I means we need to ask God for help, to not do the bad things again."
"Otay, I will not do it adain."  and then lifting the shirt and talking to God in his belly button..."  Dod, pweeze help me not to do disduction any moi. Amen"

May we all take it so literally that God lives in our hearts....  and talk to him so plainly and honestly throughout our day.


  1. Awwww....reminds me of another little distructo-boy who lived at my house. Their sweet hearts really do save them!

  2. What a wonderful lesson for us ALL to take to heart and remember.

    I likely won't look at my belly button quite the same again! :)

  3. .........and it goes on....... he just tried to defrost the freezer in the garage........ sigh.... I am eagerly anticipating nap time today........

  4. How priceless and truly a valuable lesson for us all! Now, let's pray that God 'nudges' him into no more disduction for today, at least.


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